How Selfishness Is A Healthy First Step Worth Undertaking

Posted in Personal Branding On Dec 20, 2018

Our conventional wisdom has taught us the necessity of being of service to others. We have been bought into this fallacy that ruined our well-being. Being selfless and of value to others must be preceded by being selfish. It’s detrimental to meet the needs of others before meeting our needs first. Benjamin Franklin  was right when he states that, “God helps those who help themselves.” I take it to mean that God won’t help those who meet the needs of others ahead of their own.



To drive my point home, let’s fast backwards to your early childhood. You undoubtedly have been into the experience of sharing something with other kids. If you have never been into this, just image how a four-year-child would react in his birthday party. Upon having the presents from other children and relatives they asked him to open and share them. Children want to enjoy the new stuff, but he refused to open them. His dad felt embarrassed as children are yelling at your child for not opening and sharing presents.

Unless you first deeply enjoy possessing a thing, it’s not possible to share it. The same goes for your well-being. You take care of yourself first then you can willingly care for others. Your hierarchy of needs must be met first. Your body needs rest and relaxation; your mind needs studying; your heart needs energizing emotions; your soul needs love and peace. You cannot bypass any step. Your daily caring for yourself through consistent rituals will help you feel grounded and connected. Only then taking care of others will be of value.



Putting her fans ahead of her life was the price Selena Gomez  paid for dearly. The American actress and singer achieved fame early in her life through first being a Disney star then a worldwide pop icon. By making herself available to her fans through mass and one-to-one media, she reached the stage of burn out.

Related: The One Word That Helps You Live Life On Your Own Terms

Gomez took a responsive way and decided to take care of her life. She took 90-days break to set things right. The goal of this break was to set a me-first mindset. She started out with a daily workout to improve her physical performance. To meet her mental needs, she cleaned out the clutter in her life by managing her time with her fans in social media, especially Instagram. Emotionally, she embraced her anxiety and depression instead of placing a patch on them. Spiritually, she went on listening and following her intuition that helped her transcend the burden of over-thinking.



Practicing a daily ritual of self-care helps you help others. Understanding the needs of your body and soul and working on this understanding is the first step. Upon meeting your needs, elevating and meeting others’ needs will be a fulfilling endeavor.

About The Author

Tareq Alaghoury

Tareq M. Alaghoury is the founder and Managing Director of Holistic Communications where he offers business coaching services and guidance to aspiring entrepreneurs who want to build their brands and move their business to the next level.